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Sunday, July 24, 2011

Remembering the Morning

I was out with my Mom approaching the door to a business, when my cell phone started ringing. I answered it was my brother in law unable to form a word as he was unable to speak through the tears. I asked him if it was my sister he grunted a noise referencing yes, I became overwhelmed in grief as I realized my sister was gone. I woke up realizing still filled with the full emotions of grief that it had all been a horrible dream.

I started screaming at my Mom to call my sister in a very loud gurgled half asleep crying. My Mom couldn't understand me and all I could do was keep screaming at her to phone my sister as I couldn't escape the pain of grief that had come over me. My Mom finally got what I was asking and called and there was no answer. My heart couldn't stop racing in fear, a million thoughts went racing through my head and none good as my Mom tried to reassure me it was ok they probably went out for breakfast. My Mom kept on coming up with reasons as I called and I called until over 6 hrs. had passed and we got home from running an errand and my Mom called one more time and finally had gotten a hold of them and we received the news that  my Sister was ok as ok can be. I felt like someone had finally took the weight of the world off my shoulders.

I never want to feel the way I felt this morning ever again, but reality is that day will come whether I want it to or not.

Father, you are my rock & my fortress, please strengthen me through the valley's so I can stand. I know Father you were most likely giving me a glimpse into what I will need to face when you call my sister hopefully to your Mansion. I know the enemy when fighting this war will attack our weakest spots, please protect us and those we love from any attacks from Satin & his demons. Give us the strength to face what you need us to face. In Jesus Name Amen.

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