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Monday, February 9, 2015

Life Full of Changes

I can hardly believe how long it has been since I have posted last and how much life has changed.

Last time I met with you all my dad was suspected to be in his last days. After so many long days, my dad not eating and going in and out of hospital. Me finally asking him one day if he had given up. He could not look at me. I also asked him if he remembered some of the bible verses he taught us as children. I left him that day knowing that he did not have the will to live and had given up.

I so have to thank all of you that prayed for him, and my family! I am so pleased to let you know that our Father in Heaven blessed my family with a Christmas miracle, as the week before Christmas totally unexpected my dad phoned us wanting to know if Christmas dinner was happening. Praise God for miracles!!

We expected that this Christmas past was going to be like the one before that was spent like any other day as it was only my mom, son and I which was a drastic change from house full of family we were used to in the past, full of those awkward family moments that make everyone dread those holiday get together, until they are gone. We were happily surprised and blessed by a Christmas filled with family, as my dad, brother and three nieces joined our Christmas table. My dad looked like he had never been sick and was full of energy for an 86 yr old, he could have raised me off my feet, truly a miracle!!

I will now take you back to just before December.

I was going through the online directory and job boards seeking employment, feeling beaten down as Christmas was approaching. I was feeling it was going to be another Christmas struggling to place presents under the tree for my family. I knew though it was in God's timing and I was only called to walk forward and persevere to the end.  I was in constant prayer asking God to fill my thoughts with his truth, so that I could persevere because it was his strength I needed in my weakness.

I stumbled across a couple of add for a job fair at the credit union that I had been a member of since they opened in my town and my big sister was hired to work there. My heart felt such excitement, joy peace and hope, as I would be going to a place where I knew people there for over a decade, as my kids were growing up. People that have amazing caring attitude and character. The job fair would be held in the evening after the branch was closed and it was within walking distance from home.

The evening came and I was getting ready and I had such peace getting ready and walking over to the job fair. I have to admit the closer I got the more the nerves were catching up to me as this was totally out of my comfort zone, as I was not use to job fairs. I had always in the past just walked in and walked out with a job, this time had been a long journey.

I arrived at the job fair and when I walked in I was met by familiar faces and it was like meeting up with old friends and all the nerves melted away. I was able to relax and be myself, which was such a blessing. One of the girls I knew from when my sister worked there was no one of the managers and she piped up to one of the regional managers that I was a keeper. I think I almost blushed in that moment. We had to preregister for the job fair and I had. We were broken into fair sized groups, for a group interview.

I was placed in a group with young university graduates and seasoned persons in this career field. We were asked questions and we were to take turns answering them and I surprised myself on how comfortable I was to speak up and take initiative in answering the questions while maintaining who I was as an individual.

I left the job fair with a great sense of God's presence in those moments that proceeded.

I was called to an interview at a frozen food plant. I arrived and hit it off with the manager that I would, if I got the job, his administrator.  I followed the advice of the college I went to that if my injury would not impact the job I was applying for that I shouldn't disclose it unless asked directly, but this wasn't a question an employer should be asking by law. I left the interview feeling that it went extremely well and was a strong contender for getting a job.

If my memory serves me right, I received a phone interview with the credit union and was asked to come in for an interview to the head office in Langley, the following Monday. I was so thankful that I had gotten past the not driving.

I received a call on Friday from the employer at the frozen food plant and he was angry. He had contacted my past employer and they had informed him of my injury. He wanted to know why I had not mentioned it to him. I had said that it would not impact the position I was applying for and didn't feel it was necessary. He left me with the impression that the position would have been mine but the lack of dis closer would be the end to that. Note to self-discern advice given to you, but ultimately do what feels right to your conscience. I had put what the school had told me above what my heart was telling me and now I would pay the consequences of not trusting God and being myself.

I knew I would not make that mistake again. I knew going to my interview on Monday that it would be full dis-closer and I would trust it in God's hands.

I drove into Langley for the interview and I was really early so I decided to go to Walmart and walk around, as it was a hop and a skip to where my interview was. Time came to move the minivan over to where my interview was and during the not even two minute drive, the engine light came on.

My mind started racing, would I be walking back to Abbotsford, around 20 km? What was I going to do? I only knew that I needed to get in the building and get through my interview then figure out the minivan. Nothing like going into a job interview while dealing with a vehicle crisis, but I did.

The job I interviewed for was not in my experience work wise or academic, but I was willing if they were. I would find out by phone a couple of days later that I would not get the position but was asked to come in for another position as an administrator support person.

I had decided this time that I would take transit in as I wasn't wanting the minivan to act up again, as I was unable to get it into the shop to get it fixed yet. I made it in early, this was becoming a habit, but better early then late, so I walked around until time became closer to my interview. I met with two very down to earth people that were refreshingly real and made you very comfortable in the interview process.

I would find out that I would be accepted for the position and I would start Dec 1, I was so thankful and appreciative as I watched God place all the pieces together in his perfect timing.

I have been working now for just over two months at an amazing place. The people are just amazing, they are so positive and supportive of each other. The company is so amazing, I had been a member for many years but did not have the depth of understanding of how they are so community involved and make it easy as an employee to get involved. They are a fully rounded organization in all aspects.

I feel so blessed to be working now and doubly blessed by the organization I work for!!

I see God moving in every aspect of this journey and all the glory should be his.

God takes care of the big details, but he also has been taking care of the small ones too. I have found myself with simple needs that I had no idea how I would fulfill them nut God has done it in a way that only can be him. Okay if you are a guy you might not want to read the next paragraph, be warned.

I was in need of a new bra as my only white one broke and I had no other that wouldn't stick out from most of my clothes I ware to work, but what arrives in the mail shortly after but a free coupon from Pennington’s, with no strings attached, for one free bra of my choice from their store.

God does these in many different ways in my life, from something simple as groceries, clothing, or even bigger needs like a job. I truly live Mathew 6:25-34, as I do not need to worry because he takes care of me.

We went to church on Sunday and what Pastor Jeff stuck out to me as so true. Fear is a product of forgetting the past, I am probably not quoting it exactly as my son reminds me I muddle the words but the gist is the same, You see if we do not forget what God has done in the past we have little to fear as the evidence of his sovereignty lays there. We only fear when we forget, so we should lay markers to remind us and so that when our children see them they ask what are these for and we are reminded and we share the glory of God with them.

I have to say last week I forgot to remember the past when I listened to the previous sermon about praying for God's favour in our lives. I had decided being Monday was my sisters birthday and being she had passed in 2011this was going to be a hard day and I would also be stepping into my coworkers duties as she does her civic duty and I would so need God's favour.

I prayed for God's favour and that day turned into a day that brought me to a place of overwhelmed, I came home from work feeling defeated by my perfectionism and need to do everything perfect, although I was still learning to do something I had no experience with, my head was just pounding, I have to say though my coworkers support was amazing!!

I cried out for prayer from my friends and church that night, as I questioned myself about asking God for his favour.

I was a gluten for punishment and prayed again the next morning for God's favour. I have to say on the way to work God had a little discussion with his child, me. “Child do you not see you already have favour? I have poured my favour into your life do you not see it? You ask like you have never received my favour..." I have to say I was put in a place of being humbled and needing to ask for forgiveness and yes I asked for his forgiveness.

I have to say that day was back filled with God's favour and showed me that the day before God was showing me what my life is without his favour. I am not worthy but everyday God hold's my life together and pours out his favour into it.

Thank you Father for not giving up on me and correcting me in love when I need corrected and never giving up on me when I am not worthy. I thank you for your favour you pour out in my life every single day. Please Father continue to break me where I need broken so that I may never lose sight of Jesus and what you have done for me. Consume me and transform me so that I may be reconciled to you and become the person you created me to be. In Jesus precious name amen.

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