I was this last few weeks feeling very week and overwhelmed by my circumstances as the trials of this life continue. I had been distracted and consumed by them taking my eyes off of what was important. I was letting Satin to distract me from focusing on God's promise.
I had started back to my job part time on a regular bases but instead of seeing the blessing I was given I was distracted by still not having enough for the mortgage. Satin was successfully distracting me from God, as he used fear and anxiety.
I went to my Pastorate ( "Pastorates are a congregation-sized gathering of between 20 and 35 people who meet bi-weekly on a mid-week evening to connect with others through sharing a meal and worshiping in song, prayer and study together.") on Tuesday and at the end of the Pastorate we broke into small groups to pray for each other. I promised myself I would not go into detail. I would only ask for God's strength and peace as the trials cont. and I was going to leave it at that. I have to say the Holly Spirit had something else to say about that, as I found myself blurting out, with no stopping it that we were facing loosing our home. I did managed to hold back that this mean we were facing becoming homeless. They prayed for my family and I. I had dropped my daughter off earlier to her Pastorate and she found herself faced with the same situation.
Wednesday, I had gone to Alpha and was soon to find out that this was the healing & prayer night. I filled out a prayer card asking for God's strength and peace as the trials continue coming.
God gave me a gift that night. He gave me a moment to pray for someone else by laying my hand on them. I had never done this before. I found myself being lead by the Holy Spirit as I spoke out loud. I could feel that feeling that is really hard to put into words, except for the power of God's mercy and love in that moment. I found out later the person I had been praying for had also experienced a feeling they had never experienced before. I went home from that night excited about what I had witnessed.
I woke up the next morning feeling renewed, full of God's peace, joy and strength for the day. I went off to work with my IPod Nano in hand filled with my praise music. I was detailing the Exterior of a Class A motor home in the wash bay at work in the beautiful sunshine that was poring down on me. I all of a sudden realized I had been caught doing something I had never done before in the years I had worked previously, as I heard this voice ask "Was that you I heard singing?" I think my face went three sheets of red as I came to the realization the answer was "Yes". I had been carried away with the song that had come on my IPod "Jesus Take The Wheel" by Carrie Underwood I had left where I was for a moment as I sang this song with the same passion I had one lonely night in 2009, as I followed the ambulance like I had many times before. I remember that song coming on Praise 106.5 and I was singing it with all my heart and sole as I plead with God to take the wheel as my life was slipping out of control.
I was pleading with him one more time, as I had wondered so far again and took the wheel back and I was so ready for him to take the wheel again.
I have been so filled with his peace & joy beyond understanding since. I have come to realize no matter what I loose, I will never loose his love he has for me and that is far greater than anything I can receive in this world.
God has flooded me with his truth as he brings me back to the scriptures he has taught me, in the order he has taught me:
1 Peter 1:6-7
2 Corinthians 1:3-11
Father, hallowed be your name.Your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread, ad forgive us our sins,(I need your help here father) for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation." In Jesus Christ Name Amen.
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